“Spider-Man, Spider-Man, blows away whomever he can…”
I will never be able to surpass the wonderful work Brian Heiler of Plaid Stallions fame has done in chronicling the charming shock and schlock of knockoff toys. (His book, Knock Offs: Totally Unauthorized Action Figures is a real gas.)
But as it happens, my wife was overseas recently and happened upon the wackiest, most un-Spider-Man-like Spider-Man toy you’re likely to find.
Behold, the unofficially named Commando Spider-Man, found in Hanoi and other communities in Vietnam:
Yep, Peter Parker has traded in his webshooters for an assault rifle and while he still crawls, it’s on the ground trying to get a bead on the Green Goblin so he can blow his head off.
I also appreciate the “Avengers 4: Endgame” labeling, as well as the obviously pirated artwork. And on the back, it appears there might be a Captain America version out there, which at least makes some sense.
Dig some of the other, often inscrutable highlights:
Spidey wears combat boots!
Shirt on backwards? Check.
It’s not exactly “With great power…” but it’ll do.
Commando Spider-Man cost 120,000 dong, which translates to less than $6.
Such a deal!
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March 10, 2023
And this Spidey also appears to not be white, based on his hands.
March 10, 2023
My mom bought me a military figure like this in the early 90’s thinking it was a GI Joe. Holy repurposed toy!
March 10, 2023
I’ve often said, “If I had 120,000 dong, there is nothing I could not buy”.
March 10, 2023
And I thought only Aunt May wore Army boots! If you’re willing to violate the new-in-packaging sanctity of this gem, a video of Spidey doing his night-infiltration belly crawl would be awesome.
March 10, 2023
I’ve never even heard of a Commando Spider-Man until I read this article. Yes, this version of Spidey is plenty wacky. 🙂