Introducing… FRANCO’s FREE FOR ALL FRIDAYS
The greats go by one name: Cher… Madonna… Beyoncé… Franco.
FRANCO’S FREE-FOR-ALL-FRIDAYS! By FRANCO Last week, I did a pretty bold thing: I made a list of New Year’s resolutions. Since making that list I have read that most resolutions fail before the month of January is even over! It doesn’t help when on Jan. 2 I go around making the joke, “It’s been a whole year since I read a comic book.” Or drawn any new artwork. Even worse when I wake up Jan. 1 and announce to the household that it’s been an entire year and I haven’t eaten anything but still haven’t lost any weight! But here we are, a week into the new year and I’ve already broken a few of the resolutions I’ve made — beyond the 13 I made last week. Broken: — My resolution to not say “thwip” every time I tap my credit card to pay. — Not Google myself but was impressed that I broke this one at 12:02, right after I watched Dick Clark not be at his annual New Year’s ball drop again, and hoped that someone other than Ryan Seacrest would be there… like maybe Dick Clark because they still use his name. — Using Star Trek phrases in everyday conversations, like “Dammit, I’m a doctor, not a sommelier!” when my wife asked me to open the champagne on New Year’s Eve. And New Year’s Day. And the dinner we had for friends on Jan. 3. — Get into manga (again). I realized halfway through the book that the reason it wasn’t making any sense was because I was reading it backwards. — Get a new Marvel and DC crossover event happening with Mini Marvels and Tiny Titans by trying to convince artist Chris Giarrusso to draw random pages with me and go to comic shops around the country and insert them into issues of the upcoming Superman/Spider-Man crossover. He said it was too much driving and that he couldn’t possibly drive and draw at the same time. The good thing about failing so miserably is that I gave myself an out: a grace period where if I actually break any resolutions, Imma try again, starting… now! Happy Friday! — Want more FRANCO’S FREE-FOR-ALL FRIDAYS? Come back next week! — MORE — My 13 NEW YEAR’s RESOLUTIONS. Click here. — BONK! Let’s Celebrate BOXING DAY — the Best Holiday...
FRANCO’S FREE-FOR-ALL FRIDAYS… By FRANCO I recently saw a list of things to do before you die and it got me thinking: With the new year here, I should make a list of things I might want to accomplish. Not just say it — actually do it. My promise to myself. Try and get some of these things crossed off my to-do list. I thought the best way to do this was to go the way of millions of others and draw up a list of resolutions I might never keep. So without further ado — MY 13 NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS: 1. Build my own Transformer. This way I get to name it. Joltscream Sideburns! (I’m still workshopping names.) 2. Maybe get a tattoo but it would have to be a fake one, because I don’t like needles. 3. Oh! Get over my fear of needles! 4. Read all the sci-fi classics. I don’t think that will ever happen either. Even though I have most of them. But will I ever read The Invisible Man? Let’s find out this year! 5. Try and answer some age-old questions I’ve been meaning to get to but I keep putting off. Like Figure out what Lost was about. Maybe even Twin Peaks. 6. While on the subject: Try and understand the complicated and beautiful mind of Grant Morrison. 7. Test my blood for midi-chlorians and then refuse to believe the results. 8. Sneak into Area 51. Preferably with friends because I don’t want to be detained by myself and, if we don’t get caught, I’ll have some company to grab a bite with after and discuss what we found. 9. Which reminds me, I should learn to speak Klingon. 10. Not annoy my wife as much as I do. I’m going to strive to best my old record. It has been 0 days since I last annoyed her. 11. Read all the comics I own. I’m going to try but I fear that will never happen. 12. I realize some of these may prove difficult, but this one maybe you can help out with: Make sure everyone goes out and purchases a copy of my new book Ninja Kaiju, due out in February from PaperCutz. 13. Wish you a Happy New Year! — Want more FRANCO’S FREE-FOR-ALL FRIDAYS? Come back next week! — MORE...
The greats go by one name: Cher… Madonna… Beyoncé… Franco.