Your vote counts. Theirs don’t. But don’t you want to know anyway?
In 2008, DC published a regrettable and forgettable miniseries called DC Universe: Decisions, in which superheroes aligned themselves with fictional presidential candidates, meant to show us whether they were Democrats or Republicans.
It was a pretty thin exercise, made irrelevant substantially because the real election that year was equal parts larger-than-life soap opera and historic phenomenon. Oliver Queen saying he’s supporting some liberal Democrat made up out of whole cloth doesn’t really mean much when our nation is electing its first black president, y’know?
Marvel, as it often does, had the right idea instead when it had Spidey meet — and exchange fist bumps with — Barack Obama in an issue timed to the inauguration that sold like crazy.
Still, the idea of which candidates our favorite heroes, antiheroes and villains would support is a really intriguing one, especially if those candidates are real. So I’ve decided to take a virtual page out of what New York magazine has done with TV characters and go out on a very, very, very long limb and suggest just whom these DC and Marvel characters would vote for, based on who is still in the race.
Now, in some cases I was thinking comics versions, in other cases movie or TV versions. But to explain each would kind of defeat the purpose. So make of this what you will. (And I’m allowing convicted felons to vote. Sorry.)
And by all means feel free to agree, disagree and add your own characters — I’ve left out many — in the comments below or in whichever social-media thread you found this.
All I ask is that you be civil to one another. No pitchforks, please.
Bruce Wayne: Hillary
Dick Grayson: Bernie
Barbara Gordon: Hillary
Jim Gordon: Kasich
Clark Kent: Hillary
Clark Kent in “Man of Steel”: Undecided. Cripplingly so.
Lois Lane: Bernie
Lex Luthor: What, are you kidding?
Diana Prince: Can’t vote but would robocall for Hillary.
Hal Jordan: Cruz
Guy Gardner: Trump
John Stewart: Hillary
Oliver Queen: Bernie
Dinah Lance: Hillary
Barry Allen: Kasich
John Jones: Hillary
Arthur Curry: Though born an American, he would recuse himself because he’s the monarch of a sovereign nation.
Steve Rogers: Hillary
Sam Wilson: Hillary
Tony Stark: Trump
Peter Parker: Bernie
Bruce Banner: Bernie
Thor: Can’t vote but would campaign with Trump in Minnesota
Natasha Romanoff: Probably can’t vote but wouldn’t tell anyone who she supports, anyway. Would covertly try to rig ballots for Hillary.
Phil Coulson: Kasich
Nick Fury: Cruz, but would have his ass if he got out of line.
Clint Barton: Was planning to vote but things kept getting in the way.
Matt Murdock: Bernie. Would collect signatures for Bernie. Would organize Tenants 4 Bernie.
Professor X: Hillary
Erik Lehnsherr: Hillary
Jessica Jones: Bernie
Luke Cage: Hillary
Frank Castle: Doesn’t vote because the system is broken beyond repair.
Again, feel free to agree, disagree and add your own characters in the comments below or in whichever social-media thread you found this. Just be cool to each other.